An Open Letter To: Advocates Against The Domestic Violence Database

Domestic Violence and Court Advocates:

I was a victim of domestic violence for 18 years. I was in and out of the Cook County Illinois Court Systems for years. I, just like victims everywhere, had to plead my cause in front of Judges who, for one reason or another, didn't want to be bothered. I had to make them listen. I didn't sit idly by and hope beyond hope that something or someone would may the judge see that I was the victim. That was my job. I had an overwhelming desire to be heard, to make my point, to show why I was the victim and why I needed the Order of Protection and not that my abuser/attacker needed to have one against me!!!! If you can't speak out in court, where can you speak out at? There are many advocates such as Alexis A. Moore and Heidi Markow and thousands like us, that victims can reach out to if they're being unfairly accused. We are astonished that we have not been contacted by one victim.

If I were you, I would encourage victims to have their paperwork, pictures, witnesses and all other available evidence at hand. When speaking with the police the victim should be encouraged to speak without the abuser being present and I would strongly encourage victims to have a witness who will be with them during police interviews, court appearances and during the process. This witness can be a victim advocate, family member friend, neighbor, pastor or any volunteer. The victims need support throughout the entire process and this can be accomplished in a multitude of ways.

What victims do not understand is the judge, doesn't owe them anything, doesn't know her and must remain impartial. So it would be to the victim’s advantage to ask for help/advocacy before stepping in front of a judge and to have practiced speaking about their case in a mock session before the hearing by phone or in person with an advocate. The victim needs to be clear and concise when speaking and more importantly get and keep her facts straight. The more help the better. We are here to help victims and to collaborate with you and all organizations across the nation; because we know that a united coalition of organizations is always better than one in the battle against domestic violence and stalking.

I am one victim trying to help a multitude of victims...The database is by far better than any brochure and/or any pamphlet regarding domestic violence that I've ever read or received.
In 2 years, I have only had 1 person email me to say that they were actually the victim. Her name was removed. I didn’t have to do this because its public record; however, it is not my goal or the focus of the database to victimize anyone. We are here to provide life saving information so that another person does not have to experience the hell that I have endured from abuse.
As I indicated above, the victims are only as strong and effective as their advocate/counsel. With that being said if you have knowledge of cases that involve victims of abuse and stalking being wrongfully accused please speak out and reach out for help.

There are thousands of advocates and agencies like The Weaker Vessel Inc. including: Alexis A. Moore, Heidi Markow, Susan Murphy-Milano, ACLU, Lewis and Clark Law Institute, DV Leap, Crime Victim Organization Network and others that will sign on in support of these victims. You must reach out so that they can garner the support that they need. This is essential to preventing the type of cases that you are describing. By collaborating with other agencies the victims like those that you describe will not fall through the cracks.
I urge you to reach out for help for these victims and collaborate with other advocates and agencies so that these victims will have the proper support and advocacy that they need and deserve.

We must unite and fight domestic violence and violence together in order to be successful!
United together we can make a difference!

Here is the link to crime victim organization network. Please join us in the pursuit of justice for all victims and in preventing crime across the nation and beyond.

Here are the details on CrimeVictimOrgNetwork:
Group home page: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/CrimeVictimOrgNetwork